2010年12月30日星期四

Time in the flow

Time in the flow

The Words of the Second Xin
(A)
Day, by chance, a temple, I saw the Buddha sat, in the smoke-filled in the serene quiet, are not an inexplicable affair suddenly born. Actually imaginary, if it is a live person sitting in the Buddha, but also ordinary life, this time, it would still be sitting so quietly, sitting in the mundane earthly, the wait time, the years of change, always No hi no sorrow, indifference it? If the world is not the so-called gods, and we are the same and this Buddha, but also so what? What can worship?
(B)
When life turned to spring and summer pass, the beautiful tentacles decided decadent, this time, the years a large open mouth of a loss, we can only hear, that breathing is - time in the flow, as blood flow in the body but also the same. Quietly, a little pain.
The pain was too much clutter makes mood, so I should always someone sitting alone on the lawn in his mind, those who have been combing tangled past. From the disarray of the troubles, and bring the fresh breath of carefully Mabu Kai feelings surging of life, the earth's heartbeat, youth short, the helplessness of life ... ...
Anyway, I have just ordinary people, only such a worldly life, but it also did not like the temple of the Buddha has thousands of hidden trouble, release the suffering of all sentient beings. Only in the long river of time bears witness to, living hard, live happy. I thought only the rich can also be up, the perception of this life to the full space, and this space the light of life flowing. Perhaps, only through the pain of life, to complete it.
(C)
However, many human mystery, in this moment with me away, even exhausting, I still do not want to fathom, so do not want to know ... ...
Just come and go, life is something that is really not too concerned about reality, because we brought nothing, so what has? We did not take, so what is lost?
Words and truth are so aware, but I still can not get settlement on earth.

Why Do not ask too many

Why Do not ask too many

Why can there be so much in life!
I'm just a simple people, then say something will do, do not say something annoying, arbitrary, then do not speak, to distinguish between right and wrong, clearly loving, never owed, defenses do not lose, not harm anyone save ! I just treasure: a faith, a man, a baby, a family, a gang of relatives, a group of children, a life of it!
Do not ask too much of the why, how can there be too much Why do I!
I'm just a backward people, living alone in his own quiet world, enjoy themselves, as long as in my hands every child can have sunny days, my life will be meaningful! Or is self-deception, but this is me, who can not read, who do not need to understand.
Do not ask too much of the why, how can there be too much Why do I!
I'm just a man doing things according to time, dark home, school bell rang, rang alarm to get up, hungry to eat, thirsty to drink water, Jian Mei Liangxin not do things, rather less talk, do not Quarrel with life!
Do not ask too much of the why, how can there be too much Why do I!
I'm just a man with a dream, only hope that the day I die, you can read their own books, this life of love to leave their favorite people, and that the words of the book does not need gorgeous, vivid Rhetoric, rich content, extraordinary philosophy, just to let their loved ones, read their own feelings, laugh together, cry together, moved together, with remembrance, with ideas flying together, run together towards the sun .

Black Love

Black Love

Those days before enrollment, focusing instead on my feeling of anxiety, or continue on the fight again when the old make up? On the bar, college education is too low, the school environment is also poor; make it, the future is uncertain. After much thought, or undecided. So, I told his father the difficulties of their own. My father said: "I also thought, I recently heard that a neighboring village was admitted to Peking University graduate student baby sheep. He was originally just Pucheng Normal graduate, participated in the self-examination, made specialist and undergraduate diploma, graduate school is now ready. As long as you learn, however bad the environment is also a university degree you can lower Self, not afraid of the future no way out. Why would we hang it in a tree? But mind you have to take. "Yes, I can Self! After careful consideration, I signed up.
First semester freshman year, I decided to enroll in a Chinese undergraduate self-study examination. I am twenty years old that year, the University is the dream of the three-year season of this, but for me it is black. Because I know: the lowest level of the University College. When the "specialist" should be an exit, I will have stock of black subconscious repression, even from the eyes of others silent, I feel the spirit of every crash. In reality, I looked down, but my heart the strength to save the. So I said little all day, just like Gou revenge energies studying hard. I always clip the morning rush a sesame seed bun went to morning reading, when I always go to get the first class. Only at night until the lights go. Others engage in recreational activities usually I do not go, just reading. To tell the truth, the Chinese had no depth of professional courses, but I give myself reading out a huge plan to do with reading classics curriculum. Learn the curriculum, careful review and meet the test. Every time I had two self-imposed Self courses will not affect learning in school, but also efforts to make a passing grade. Senior year, I passed the oral defense, and finally made the Chinese undergraduate diploma at Northwestern University.
Receive diplomas that day, the sun shone nice and warm, it is particularly bright. I hand out diplomas, West gate, looking at the red silk background of gold Guangcan the characters, I feel everything is so hard to come by. Sunday, I seemed to see their own persimmon tree in the Southern Highland figure unscrupulous read aloud, and think of boating books library reading room sea, immersed in ancient and modern fugue ride, but also remember walking in mind before the exam, such as the monk chanting, Lu-yu acquaintances without setting the man laughed at Shayang awareness. Yes ah, a sum of characters in this painting, the combination of my young life much sweat, tears and laughter! It is a unique puzzle to clear, self punch to the mentality of self-confidence. By Self, I proved myself.

2010年12月23日星期四

Pale memory, blood red under a willow

Pale memory, blood red under a willow

Everywhere are warm throughout the summer, the school wall with five willow species. She was under the willow trees in the third branch from a drawing board, carefully painted iron fence outside of a river. Noise, clutter basketball pop sound, as well as screaming girls in the expansion of the campus from an invisible membrane, invisible to show off the youth.
Every time she sticks from the easel, broke away as a barrier, as isolated. Placid, a rice paper outlines an aesthetic lines.
"She has painted a picture sixty-eight lawn." On the second floor window, Meng Yang watched the girl make her curious, launched a stay. Seems something that makes him the only school daze read like.
Her name is Zou Chong Asia, a very interesting name. He and her neighbors, who just moved here less than a year. Miracle is that she never said a word to him, if she did not say, "Yes, ah, oh", Meng Yang will she be as dumb.
Her home is the battlefield better, will be issued each day thrilling cries. At first, Meng Yang's father at their home a pull, then they have got used to. Often at dinner next to the bowl will fall in the district where the voice echoed. Understanding of the family looked on as one, and then eating their own.
In this environment, she is always black and blue. Meng Yang Meng Yang's father to bring food to school, and then opened the door and push the bike, he happened to see her, and saw the scars on her face. With tape wrapped around behind the backs of the many items on the drawing board. Her hair was messy, is intentionally used to block the swelling of the face of the Green marks. It was a bit distressed.
2.
"I heard a man named Zou washed three Six Asian girls get a famous school admission notice it!"
"I have heard it is still very beautiful."
Those girls whispering to each other, whispered all day alone with the willow trees in the third branch from the drawing board following the girl. Meng Yang ears listen carefully, a little bit about her, in spite of all surfaces.
She rode a bicycle through the whole piece poplar trees shade the entire film, riding the fast, will be distributed behind. A bend, she was grinding to a brick, fell to the ground.
Meng Yang from her side rode slowly, thinking that she would weep, or get up to see him, get some help. Meng Yang a little disappointed, she just patted him in the earth, back on its feet, the blood soaked his pants leg. Like a stubborn child.
It definitely hurts. A glimpse of the dust and wounds her, silent heart Meng Yang said. He rode back and asked her if she needs help Mody. She shook her head, biting his lips bicycle.
When Meng Yang returned home, he saw her mother was raising his arm and fell on her face. Disgusting mouth curses "dead girl, how did killed you, not your clothes, wash it."
Whispered the neighbors are, no one stepped forward to stop it. Hand and lift will fall, Meng Yang some distressed, and took both her hands and said: "not that dirty clothes, as it?"
"Our family was on the wheel do you close?" She tossed the head of curly hair, and Meng Yang does not seem to intend to mercy. Meng Yang's mother was seen in the next, there is no curse.
Meng Yang's mother came forward grabbed his son's arm back, whisper: "You charge a good person, do not move things." Slammed the door shut, only to hear the door bang and bang Genghen beaten .
3.
"You have not graduated from University of exceptional admit you, you on it?"
"No, not on."
Meng Yang boring some of asked for it, said, after these two, is a very long silence. Two people do not see the quiet beauty of the evening, time seemed to be somewhat lengthy. Willow trees outside this very humid air, mixed with the fragrance of the soil, sludge smell, the smell down imaginary line of sight is get very real. Her skilled watercolor painting on paper, the red pigment has been used up, the vial has been squeezed dry into a ball.
She painted the house special lawn and creek clean water and very slow, very symbol of her temper. Sunset the sun is very soft, she likes disheveled hair, some red light through the hair, but also pure than those pigments, Meng Yang see some fascinating.
"That thank you."
"Ah? Oh, all right." Meng Yang carries the package with her unexpected, he told her cart midnight, not the least bit emotional tone, Meng Yang some depressed.
Through the crowded after school, came before the willow, but also to look at her painting. Have no desire to see her fingers back and forth. Hesitated a moment, Meng Yang took out a box of paints from the bag, handed it to her. Some embarrassed, afraid she thinks is his compassion for her, they said nothing to the paint on her eyes, a full five seconds.
"I do not need." She said coldly, his tone in some loss, but it sounds very strong.
"This paint has been in my drawer for almost a year, and if you do not know will not expire." What a bad excuse, Meng Yang said after a bit sorry.
"You do not need to pity me. That the new paint is first entered, I had seen this morning."

That winter, the flower freely walking

That winter, the flower freely walking

Wedge.
Once in the millennium snow lotus bloom in the cliffs. Even if you have the legendary K-Swiss magic around the snow lotus suffered the attack around the snake. Snow lotus is beautiful, the United States enough to allow many people risk their lives to pick. Appears in their eyes, get it, is more important than his own life. Thousands of good fortune, making the person you want to be extremely close to its desire. Come and opportunities, it seems that God has given the prize. If the sit idly by, just as with God against us. In this way, to a group of people, the death group. Then again, and finally death. Cycle, flowering defeat. Wait another thousand years. Not the same faces, the same desire, the same outcome. No doubt, snakes, is the snow lotus weapons.
Perhaps, all things are the same. In order not to hurt them and desperately use another means to resist the invasion of the outside world. They not wait to see any person, is always a person, life, lonely death. This is their fate, just as the proud princess. Each side in the land, the people have admired them, the guards have a tail as protection. Million people in the eyes, they are happy. However, their heart, always no one can understand.
1.
I always like to take a nap lazily lying on the table. Noon, accompanied by chirping crickets in the summer, in that noisy environment, alone, enjoying the quiet of their own. I'm not afraid of anything, just afraid that one day suddenly will not dreaming. I became a lonely shadow, but also thanks to my mother, who high above the head teacher, the airs of a woman, full of exclusive High School 3 class, full of pride, full of ignorant. Group of teenagers, is nothing more than talking about who had a favorable impression of who, who and who's hand today accidentally touched. All students, however these are my reasons are to avoid the simple reason that, because I was the class teacher's daughter. I also know that they are nothing more than fear of the woman I talk to complain, and then she called the office for fear of being training badly.
In fact, they do not know, I have a very long time had not lived with his mother. Rather, in addition to her class met her virtually no opportunity to meet. Yes, she and her father have been separated for many years, but she still insisted on seeing me sub in her class, is to let me know how much she was stronger than his father. However, the situation had little to love those little rumors that I am not interested, even if the mother can experience what, I did not snitch ideas. But very cherish this quiet. However, there are always inexplicable panic in mind, the quiet one day disappear, and that afternoon dream time also will eventually be ruthless confiscated.
Fan creaking overhead Shally cried, sweat on his forehead shaped hair stick into a thick, shaped edge to form a bar-like look. Abnormal noisy classroom, or at least far more lively than usual. Facing the wall, I felt faint shadow of the doorway for several more, where a mixture of cheers, jumping sound, hit the applause, booing and even the sound of screaming. These seem nothing to do with me, let the world no matter how loud I can hear a world of your own breathing. In fact, this is enough, no one else disturbed, would leisurely steal someone else just can not be static.
"Bai Ling ... ..."
"Wow, so beautiful ... ..."
"That eye is simply ... ..."
2.
Bai Ling's walk in the middle of the crowd of self, as if the world itself is her stage, everyone will be her audience cheering for her, for her joy. I carefully stretched and cracks from the people to see her face. Pink, broad forehead had laid his identity, sexy lips, tilt, light juicy sloshing around in the eye. Where I feel like I've seen her, my mind suddenly kind of sense of sadness. Mother excited clapping her hands came to us late admissions Bai Ling is our class, let us take care of the future lot. Sneer while my heart, Oh, proud people who are pretending to still fragile, in the eyes of others has always been the role played prettily. Yes, this is my impression of Bai Ling. Once again of my mother, the superior class and feel sad.

Hypnosis, and then escape

Hypnosis, and then escape

1
Early winter sun ambiguous. After eloquent in your local shop, but pretending to casual, climb your brow.
Window is not translucent, thin adhesive dust. Thick brown curtains, looks dirty. Windows glowing silver-white cold light bar.
The teacher is talking Matlab. PPT turned quickly. Into the brain of digital characters uncommon, found a hidden gully up the brain, waiting for exam call.
Wei staring at him, look like an awl. Teachers strange, do not see the actual age. Sparse hair, many bright peaked. When he smiled, the whole world silent; he does not laugh when the whole world laughing. He laughed very cold, Wei blurred. Reduction in the others can not detect the corner, coldly analyzing every inch of his body mutilated, Wei like that.
Is not comfortable sitting in the window. Fortunately, few students here. Not bad, there is sunshine. Wei is always deliberate, and the performance is free, and his classmates are separated a certain distance. Wei wear a larger size sportswear, Slop larger size shoes, back pack loose shoulders. Wei face sluggish most of the time, silent as the body.
Wei looking out the window. Tallow tree bare. Leaves do not know whom to go to sweep. Two days ago, it is orange garden trees, it is truly attractive. Wei Lin also took strong take photographs in the shadow flicker, fixed Gewei doll-like faces.
Break, Wei out of hair, rubbed his swollen eyes, and shake off fatigue. The toilet door, three girls around the Sisi, Sisi holding his right index finger. Hit the door just came out, you see, have broken the skin, it hurts ah! Cc satay made with warm tone, very pure and innocent face. Wei, head down through, chuckle, Cc's so delicate own can not learn.
Pretend to be pure hell! Holding a finger with a man holding a genital like. Ya do not know how many times by men on it! Lin tossed hand drops, to keep up with Wei, while cursing.
Wei, handing me paper towels, shrugged, not position. Had nothing to do armchair, has always been the attitude of Wei.
Continuation of Section II. Wei did not want to attend a lecture. Frontier headphones, took Gu, Wei, one of the most comfortable position to sit. Wei did not skip class. She has always been a law-abiding students. However, her current status, and skipping is no different.
No sense to do things just for peace of mind. Wei ostrich attitude towards parents with hope, with the spirit of Ah Q perfunctory their own preferences.
2
Air dry, the wind is fickle. This is some hungry season. Fanghua the dead flowers and trees, such as prostitutes, can not be nearly naked to attract attention. Tights rampant, high boots Tititata.
Gray sky, gray mood Wei defeated. She was teasing the weather, and throat irritation fester. Wei could not speak, although she has always been taciturn. Suffered a day to reduce pain without the slightest momentum.
Sisi Wei offered to accompany to the doctor. Wei flattered, smiled and said no.
Do not see a doctor carefully, tonsils, it is easy fever. Moreover, the face will be lit from a lot of nasty acne, this is the most terrible. Cc yelling, a matter not resolved on the end of the world face.
Just about looks, sesame Cc large spots will also be increased to as serious class conflict. Wei very helpless, but the warm heart. Cc high-profile work, but still is a passionate girl.
Sisi Wei has been holding the arm. She wore stiletto, Wei higher end, such as the slippery body bone Sheban lopsided Wei. Wei not used to such intimate physical contact, although there Cc so that each boy coveted figure.
Clinics in the light is very white. Doctors with a poker face, asked, check, billing, medication. Cc interrupted, let alone the added doctors in the medicine mifepristone and prostaglandins. Doctor, my sister is still small, nothing at all. This kind of thing, she was embarrassed to speak.
Doctor glanced Wei, contempt but commonplace. Girls to know how to protect his own body.
Body, why not the body? Atmosphere, some strange. Doctors without looking up. Cc look pamper. Wei is at a loss.
Sisi said the door to answer a call to the clinic. Wei took the drug alone, a single to open the medicine. Look at two boxes of medicine Wei walking instructions, suddenly pale. Abortion drugs. Wei suddenly understood everything. Cc a gentle weave of the net, sweet smile, a kind of ignorance netted Wei.
Wei hurried walk, blood on the Bay, you want to immediately find the Cc, questioning everything. White-labeled by a Shi Penzai unprovoked, Wei better temper, can not be tolerated.
The hands of the drug to scatter. Wei hit a person. He features beautiful, color white, handsome. Class he is called "Goddess." Goddess, Deputy to the good girls are coveted bladder. Of course, he also Wei's spy within the ranks. He picked up two boxes of medicine, carefully read the above words, light eyebrows, and gave Wei. Wei, flush face, ears are burnings of. Time of silence, but can not be reversed in this episode. Wei teeth biting the lower lip, took the drug. The empress's eyes swept gradually began to whiten the face Wei, Wei head down. His eyes are not sharp and allows the heart Wei bitter pain a bit. Wei did not know him as, a desperate escape.
Thermal shock. Wei saw an innocent smile and blink Cc such as a brush-like eyelashes, very cold.